Tuesday, 31 March 2015

Too windy

I don't like it outside, today - the weather seems to be evil.

It's sunny, but even when I sit still, the wind blows all my fur back. I don't like this.

It also pushes my little catty whiskers back when I'm walking. I don't like this either.

It makes things fly into me; soggy leaves, bits of dirt, twigs. I'm the proud owner of a clean coat, so this doesn't please me.

The wind even made a leaf blow into one of my sensitive ears, making me do multiple catty head shakes. Not good.

I shall nap and whinge until the wind goes away.

Friday, 27 March 2015

Too late

I really wanted to go outside, just a few moments ago.

I meowed at my human, but he didn't pay attention.

I went to the door and meowed next to it.

Then I started clawing at the edge of the door.

After that, I pawed and pawed at the door, standing up on my back legs.

When my human didn't pay me any attention, I went over to his favourite soft chair and started scratching it. He shouted 'Clive!'

I wandered back over to the door again, pawed it, and meowed as loudly as I could.

My human said 'fuck's sake, Clive!'... then opened the door.

He was too late though. I'd decided that I didn't want to go outside after all, so I walked off in the opposite direction.

Silly human.

Wednesday, 25 March 2015

Dangling thing

I was having a nice, relaxing nap last night, when my human dragged something past me.

Suddenly, my sleepy catty eyes flew open: was that a mouse tail??

I had a quick swipe at this thing, but it got away from me.

My human swished it past me again. It was black and really thin. I bit it, and swiped again.

I don't know what it was, but I was now in full hunting mode.
My human swished it again, and I swiped it, bit it, caught it, and bunny kicked it.

I thought
I finally had it, but my human pulled it away from me again.

At the end of its thin, black tail, it had a square thing with three long bits sticking out of it. It said 'Samsung' on it, but I'm not sure what that means.

What kind of animal is a Samsung, and why does my human tease me with it? Strange being...

Monday, 23 March 2015

I smell nice

I had some beef in jelly stuff, this morning. It was nice.

My human tried to fool me with some dried out food from yesterday. I'm not silly: I sniffed it and walked away.

Eventually, my human put out the fresh beef stuff, and I ate.

I enjoyed the food so much, that I thought it'd be good if I smelt of it too, so I washed myself.

I licked the beef smell all over my paws, my tail, and my front.

Now, whenever I smell myself I purr, and lots of catty friends have come up to me, to sniff me and rub noses.

Tomorrow, I hope to smell of chicken.

Saturday, 21 March 2015

What to do...

It was boring indoors, so I went outside.

It was cold outside, so I came indoors.

There was nothing to chase, so I went outside.

There was nothing to chase, so I came indoors.

The air smelt funny, so I went outside.

It was too bright, so I came indoors.

A chair was in the wrong position, so I went outside.

There were too many sounds, so I came indoors.

I'm tired now. Nap time.

Friday, 20 March 2015

Nasty yellow things

I was watching a blackbird on a branch, before - hoping it'd fall off.

It didn't happen.

Underneath the tree were some green stalks with yellow flowers.

I wasn't hungry, but I did have a funny tummy and was frustrated by the blackbird, so I chewed some of the flowers.

I chewed and chewed... and realised they tasted awful.

I did a catty wretch... then another catty wretch ... then another catty wretch.

I won't be eating them again.

Wednesday, 18 March 2015









Tall tree.


Monday, 16 March 2015

Catty headache

It is spring. There are more birds around.
They seem to have woken up.

I have been watching blackbirds, sparrows, thrushes,
and blue tits go backwards and forwards, left and right, while looking through a window.

At one point, I got really excited, and started chattering at a sparrow that was outside.

Then one particular blackbird caught my eye. It was flying back and forth, back and forth. My head was going side to side, watching it... then I turned my head really quickly, and it hit the window with a 'boing'.
This completely rattled my little catty brain. I had to do a big catty head shake, then jump down from the window. No more bird watching for me today.

Now my head feels all funny. I keep having to nap.

I'm going to have another of those naps.

If I feel a bit better
, later, I'll stare at my human until he gives me some of whatever he's eating.

Saturday, 14 March 2015

Appreciating my human

I had fun with my human this morning. I wanted to show him some appreciation.

He looked at me, and I blinked at him.

I blinked at him again.

I blinked at him again.

I blinked at him again.

Then he blinked at me.

I blinked back at him.

I blinked again.

I blinked again.

Then I had food.

Thursday, 12 March 2015

Need more space

My human went out today, so I decided to look for new places to nap.

I tried his blue chair, for a change, but I didn't like it. However, above that is a desk.

I jumped onto the desk and had a sniff and a look around.

There were lots of things on this desk. I didn't like them there.
I wanted more space to curl up.

There was a pot full of pens. I didn't like that, so I pawed it until it fell off the desk.

There were some papers in the wrong place. I didn't like that, so I pawed them off the desk.

There were some folders at the far end of the desk. I didn't like them, so I pawed them off.

I cleared a good space for myself, and settled down to a nice, long nap.

I like it there. I think I'll do that again.

Tuesday, 10 March 2015

Bird watching

It is spring.

It is sunny.

More birds are around.

This morning, I sat and watched a sparrow for several catty hours.

It was on a high branch, then at the top of a fence... then back on the high branch.
I sat underneath the tree and stared up at it, swishing my tail.
I meowed at it, then chattered quite a bit.
I was very excited.

After the sparrow flew away, I spotted a thrush in another tree. I stood under that tree and meowed and chattered at this new bird, swishing my tail some more.

I had lots of fun.

After that, I had a wee, then came in for a nap.

Sunday, 8 March 2015

A new human

A new human - one I'd not seen before - came round to see my human today.

I quite like new humans. They may well have some tuna with them.

As she came through the door, I gave a 'hi!' meow, and headed towards her legs. I criss-crossed in front of her, rubbing those legs, but she didn't seem to pay me any attention.

She sat down on a chair, but didn't look at me. I like humans who do this.

She continued not looking at me, so I wandered over to her. I meowed, but she didn't put a hand out to pat me.

After what seemed like 10,000 catty years, with no attention, I jumped up onto the seat next to her.

I purred and gave her arm a series of catty headbutts and nose nudges.

She gave me a strange look, then looked away.
  I decided I should curl up next to this human.

I snuggled in, next to her leg, and laid my chin on her.

She still wouldn't look at me.

I like this human.

I hope to nap on her again.

Friday, 6 March 2015


It is sunny, and I have been outside.

I feel a bit sick though (may have to go back outside and eat some grass).

When it starts getting warm and sunny, the first bees and flies come out to play.

I get very excited and I watch them, sometimes pouncing on them.

Unfortunately, I saw a bee and a fly at the same time, and tried to follow both of them with my eyes.
They kept crossing paths, so my little catty head went round, and round, and round... trying to watch them.

They flew off and I realised that I felt really dizzy.

I had to do several catty headshakes, before I could move from where I was sitting.

I've now come inside and may have to sleep for a bit.

Not good.

Wednesday, 4 March 2015

I has ways to get in

I was wandering around, yesterday, when I heard my human's vroom, from a distance. I know its particular sound: it growls and squeaks.

I ran across some gardens and arrived next to my human's vroom, just as it came to a stop. I wanted to greet my human... and I was hungry.

I meowed and meowed, to say 'hi', and sat next to the door to his vroom.

He usually opens the door immediately, pats me on the head, and scratches my ears, but he didn't do that.

He had something to his ear, and was talking and talking, not paying me any attention.

By now I was so hungry, I feared I might die. I needed to get indoors and eat.

I kept meowing and meowing at the vroom door, but my human wasn't listening.

I jumped onto the front of the vroom, but still no attention.

I spotted something sticking out of the side of the vroom. It looked important so I started batting it with my paw... then I started pulling it back with my paw. It started to loosen, and wiggle a bit.

I heard my human shout: 'Clive! Stop it!'

Ah, some attention!

I kept pulling the thing on the side of the vroom, and my human opened the door, shouted 'Clive!', and sighed.

He then spoke into the thing by his ear, and said; 'I'll call you back, mate'

I led him to the front door - being sure to rub against his legs a few times, and purr - and he let me in.

I led him to the food bowl, sat by it, meowed a few times, and finally - finally! - he fed me.

Silly human.

Monday, 2 March 2015

Strictly on the left

My favourite cushion has been moved.

This is a disaster.

It is red and brown, and is always, always on the left of my favourite chair.

Today, it was on the right.

I meowed and meowed my dissatisfaction to my human - I was very unsettled by this development - but he did not seem to understand my concerns.

I clawed chairs and pawed door frames, and continued to meow to show how anxious I was.

Eventually, my human said 'what the bloody hell is wrong with you?' and picked me up, then carried me over to my favourite chair and plonked me on it.
In doing this, he accidentally knocked the cushion over to the right side.

This made me happy.

I stopped meowing.

I wrapped my tail around my nose and had a nap.