Wednesday, 30 September 2015

Horrible, tooth stuff

I was watching my human do this thing he does every morning: rubbing stuff all over his teeth.

I sat by him for a bit, staring up at him and swishing my tail.

I didn't feel I was getting enough attention, and I was interested in the white stuff that he squeezed from a tube: it looked like food.

I meowed at him, loudly, until I got his attention.

He said 'what do you want, Clive?' so I just stared at him, then he bent down and I went to sniff the things he was holding.

I really wanted to see if the white stuff was food.

He put a bit on his finger, and held it out. I sniffed it, and it was so strong that it hurt my little catty nostrils, so I moved back... and he smudged a bit on my nose.

I couldn't get it off!

It was stuck on my nose!

I tried to run away from the smell, but it was on my face!

Get it off! Get it off!
Get it off!

I flapped my paws at my nose, but this just smeared it.

Then my human bent down again, and wiped it off my nose... but I could still smell it.
I wandered off, doing catty headshakes.

Stupid human.

Monday, 28 September 2015

Dangerous Trees

I was outside surveying my kingdom, today.

I like doing this, particularly at this time of year when I can look around and blink at the sun, without getting too hot.

I was nice and relaxed, watching leaves fall down, and looking out for meeces, when ... something fell next to me!

I jumped catty miles into the air and ran towards my human, who was indoors.

I stopped at the door, looked back ... and realised that the thing which made me jump was just some kind of weird fruit that fell from a tree. I saw another one fall.

I went over and sniffed these fruits. They didn't smell of much, but they were spiky on the outside.

It's a dangerous time of year. I'll have to be careful.

Thursday, 24 September 2015

Dangly thing

I was napping, yesterday, when my human came into his sleeping room.

My eyes opened a bit, to see him, then something swished past me...

Dangly thing!

Dangly thing!

Dangly thing!

Dangly thing!

Dangly thing!

Dangly thing!

Dangly thing!

Then I went back to napping.

Tuesday, 22 September 2015


I woke up from a nap, this morning, in hunting mode.

I walked into the main room, and - at the far end - saw what looked like a fly.

I crouched low and inched towards it, my catty senses tuned in.

I stared at it, to work out the best angle to approach it from.

My whiskers switched.

My tail swished.

The fly didn't move.

I slowly crept towards it, coming from its right.

I stared, and stared, and stared.

I started to swish my tail quicker.

I got closer.

I did a little pre-pounce bum wiggle, and...


...but it didn't even try to fly off.

I stop clawing and bunny kicking... and realised that it was a raisin that had been left on the floor, not a fly.

I bit it anyway.

Then I went and had another nap.

Monday, 21 September 2015

Thank you, human

I have to thank my human.

I had a moment of panic, this morning.

I was lying down and I was trying to clean my ear by licking my paw, then wiping my head with it.

I was mid-wipe, when my paw got stuck behind my ear and I couldn't get it back again.

I panicked, grumbled, then let out a meow.

My human came over to me, said 'silly', then freed my paw.   I nose-nudged his hand.

Thanks hooman.

Friday, 18 September 2015

Oooh, lots of legs!

I'm happy.

It's the season for lots of little legs - lots of crunchy, tasty little legs.

Big spiders seem to be running around. I like to chase them - it's good hunting practice.

I like to paw them. They're quite small, so sometimes I make one or two of their legs falls off.
If this happens, I eat the legs - they're very tasty, and crunchy.

Sometimes I accidentally kill the spiders. This makes me sad. Then I remember that I'm hungry, and eat the whole spider. They're small, crunchy, juicy, and yummy.

I think my human finds this weird. He just stares at me when I eat a spider.

The other spiders come inside, too - the flying ones.
I like these. I can chase them around, while they fly in the air, then swat them down with my mighty paws.
Their legs are a bit thinner, but they also have wings, so they have a good bite to them and are just as tasty as normal spiders.

I like this time of year - it's yummy.

Wednesday, 16 September 2015

Tap, tap, oh...

My human was in the food room this morning. He was eating something (I sniffed it. It wasn't worth eating), reading something, and drinking something.

I was curious as to what was in the cup he was drinking from. It smelt funny. It made my little catty nose wrinkle.
I also wanted some attention. I felt my human was reading too much.

I tapped the cup with my paw.

I tapped the cup again.

I tapped it harder. It wobbled.

I tapped it harder... and it fell over.

Hot, brown liquid went everywhere! It went on my catty fur!
I meowed and jumped in the air.
My human shouted 'Clive!', and I ran away.

I tried to lick the stuff off me, but it tastes weird and made me do a catty headshake.

I have hidden on a bed.

Tuesday, 15 September 2015


I'm not sure my human quite understands, but sometimes I just like to stare at things.

Sometimes I like to stare at my human until he notices ... then I look away.

Sometimes I just like to stare at a part of the wall.

Sometimes I like to stare at the floor.

Today, I've stared at my human, a chair, some grass, an ant, a stone, and a plant pot.

It's been a tough day.

Friday, 11 September 2015

Falling asleep

I was having a lovely nap on my human's bed. It was nighttime, so he was asleep.

I'd decided to nap on a pile of paper he'd left at the end of the bed, which was kind of him.

I was really relaxed, when suddenly I was clawing at fresh air and falling down. I hit the floor, meowed loudly, then sat up.

The paper I was napping on must've fallen off the bed.

My human said; 'Clive? What's wrong?'

I licked my fur to show that I wasn't bothered at falling off the bed, then went to eat some chicken biscuits.

I blame my human.

Wednesday, 9 September 2015

Fake mouse tails

My human has gone out.

He left the things he often uses to cover his lower paws - I think he calls them 'shoes'.

They have things attached to them which look like little meeces tails - white meeces tails.
I have spent the morning pouncing on them and chewing them. It's been fun.

I'm going to have a nap now.

Monday, 7 September 2015

Surveying my kingdom

Sometimes, I like to go outside, sit down, and just look across my territory.

I'm not looking at anything in particular - I'm just watching all of the leaves moving, the grass rustling, any small movements, and any birds that might land... but with no plans to pounce.

I quite like sitting, staring, and twitching my ears.

After that, I usually go inside and ask my human for food.

Friday, 4 September 2015

The tail decides

I couldn't decide if I wanted to go outside this morning.

My human opened the door and I looked across my territory.

My tail swished left.

My tail swished right.

My tail swished left.

My tail swished right.

My tail swished left.

My tail swished right.

My tail swished left.

My tail swished right.

My tail swished left.

My tail swished right.

In the end, I decided to nap on the mat next to the door.

Thursday, 3 September 2015

That click...

I was at the bottom of my territory, having a nap on some soft mud, when my ears suddenly twitched round.

I heard it.

In the distance.

That click.

My human was opening a tin of tuna.

I woke up, stretched, quickly ran across the grass, through the door, then slowed down to walk into the food room and sit next to my human.

His back was to me, so I thought I should let him know of my presence and my need for tuna.

I let out my loudest 'hi' meow, and - strangely - he jumped, dropped a fork, and said; 'Clive! Where did you come from?'

I purred and ate some tuna off the fork he dropped, then waited for some more.

He gave me a little bit more, then ate the rest himself.
I stared at him while he did this. I like tuna.