Thursday, 30 March 2017

Paw flapping

I came in last night.
I had a hungry.
I needed food.

I meowed.

I looked around the floor and my human had very kindly left lots of things that I could flap with my paws, to get attention.

I flapped the pages of a book with my paw.

I flapped the pages of a pad with my paw.

I flapped some letters with my paw.

I flapped another book with my paw.

I flapped a pile of paper with my paw.

My human got up and said 'Alright! Al-bloody-right!', then walked very quickly and put a bowl of food out for me.

I was happy.

Tuesday, 28 March 2017

Fish hands

I went up to my human and sniffed him.

He smelt of human, but then I could smell something else... I could smell fish.

I sniffed his legs.

I sniffed his feets.

I sniffed his belly.

I sniffed his arms.

The smell of fish was getting stronger.

I sniffed his hands.

I had a happy.
I licked one hand and it was nice.

I licked the other hand and it was also nice.

There was a small crinkly thing next to him that said 'Scampi Fries' on it.
I don't know what this means, but I licked that too.

Sunday, 26 March 2017

White bits

I stood under a tree before.

I looked up at it.

Little white bits fell down onto my face.
I blinked.

More little white bits fell down on my face.
I did a catty-choo.

More little white bits fell down on my face.
I did a big catty-choo.

I stopped looking up at the tree.

This time of year is confusing.

Friday, 24 March 2017

Yellow things

I'm excited.
The yellow things are out.

I like sniffing the yellow things.

I like pouncing on the yellow things.

I like running through the yellow things.

I ran through some yellow things today.
A few of them fell over.

I has a happy.

Wednesday, 22 March 2017

A good spot

I came inside last night and felt the urgent need to clean my paws.

I meowed, jumped onto the bed where my human was, walked along his body, then decided to sit on his head.

His head was warm.
It was a good place to sit.

I decided that this was a good spot to clean my paws.

I started licking my paws while sitting on my human's head.
He opened his eyes and said; 'Clive - get off'.

I carried on licking my paws.

Monday, 20 March 2017


I came in last night, to see my human.
I sniffed his face, then curled up on his legs for a nap.

I woke up and decided that I needed to eat some biscuits.
I jumped back on the bed and curled up next to my human.

I needed a wee, so I got down from the bed and went outside.

I came back in, walked up and down my human for a bit,
then fell asleep near his head.

I woke up and felt like looking round my territory,
so I ran outside.

I came back in, meowed, and fell asleep next to my human.

I woke up and wondered whether there were any meeces outside yet. I went out, but couldn't find any.

I came back in, nose-nudged my human, then had a nap by his face.

It was a tiring night.

Saturday, 18 March 2017

Hurty plant

I was outside, sniffing things in my territory.

I went to a new bit, where I'd never been before.

I stuck my nose into a plant... and it poked me.
It made my nose feel ouchy.

This made me sad.

I wasn't sure why it had happened, so I stuck my nose in the plant again. It poked me in the nose.

My nose was now hurty, and I had to do catty headshakes.

Evil plant.

Thursday, 16 March 2017

Get out!

I went outside for a wee.

When I finished my wee, I could smell another scent on my territory.
I could smell a catty scent.

I wasn't happy.

I sniffed and sniffed... then I looked up and saw a pair of eyes, not too far away.

I was angry.
This is my territory.

It was a cat with black and white fur.
It was smaller than me.
It was a boy cat.
He swished his tail.

I let out a low meow, to warn him.

I puffed out my fur.

I let out a yowl.

He stood and swished his tail.

I ran at him - yowling.

He ran towards a fence.
I swiped at his back with my claws.

He ran up to the top of the fence and back down again.

My human came outside, shouting 'Oi! Stop it!'

He was in my way.
I hissed at him.

The cat shot off, onto the grass.
I ran after him, yowling.

My human ran after us, shouting 'Clive!'

The cat ran off and I couldn't find him.

I came back inside, meowed at my human, and rubbed against his leg.

Monday, 13 March 2017

Catty break

I has been in a catty hotel.
My human took me there in the box.

I didn’t like that being in the catty hotel meant I couldn’t wander, go out for sniffs, or check on my territory.

I did like some things though.
The catty hotel had a bed that was made of warms.
The biscuits tasted good.
Lots of different humans gave me ear scritches.
There was a shelf I could sit on, by a big window – I looked out at all of the birds that landed on the trees and imagined biting them.

Now that I’m home, I’ll have to rub against everything so that it smells of me again.
I’ll also have to check on my territory.

I’m a bit annoyed with my human.
I shall turn my back on him for a few days.

Friday, 10 March 2017

The box

The box is out.

Why has my human got the box out?
What is he up to?

I don't like the box.
It smells of catty doctors.

I went up to the box and sniffed it.
I pawed the side bit.
I hissed at it.
Horrible box.

I shall see why my human has it out, and decide whether to forgive him.

Tuesday, 7 March 2017


I went over to see my other humans yesterday.

I sniffed them all.
I was given chicken.
I curled up next to the big warm thing which says 'AGA' on it.

I got up and had a wander, rubbing myself against all chairs and walls.

I jumped onto one of the humans' beds.
She stroked my head and said nice things in a high-pitched voice.
She looked at all of my claws and cut the ends a bit.
She brushed my fur.
I purred.

I has fuss.
I has a happy.

Sunday, 5 March 2017


I came in last night and jumped on the bed to see my human.

I like to rub noses. It makes me feel happy and comfortable.

I walked along my human, put my nose on his, and nudged.

He didn't do anything, so I nudged harder.

He opened his eyes and said 'Clive... what'.

I was happy. I purred, and nudged his nose with mine again.

He said 'Clive... not now'.

I nudged his nose with mine again.

He gave me a nudge back, with his nose, then said something about sleep.

I was happy.
I moved my paws up and down on his chest, turned around,
then walked back down to his legs and slept on them.

Friday, 3 March 2017

Oooh, flappy

My human has changed something about the thing he puts to his ear and talks into.
It has this new black thing round it.
I pawed it and found that it flaps. It's a flappy thing.

My human had this next to him on the bed.
I flapped it with my paw.
I flapped it with my paw.
I flapped it with my paw.

My human said 'stop it, Clive'.

I looked at him.
I blinked.
I flapped the flappy thing with my paw.