Tuesday 23 February 2016

Strange holiday

I've just had a very confusing few days.

It started when my human trapped me in the weird plastic box. He lured me there with a small piece of cheese. Evil human.

He then put me in the vroom. I hate the vroom - it constantly moves, there are funny noises, and it makes me feel sick.
I meowed, and meowed, and meowed.

My human then stopped the vroom and took me, in the plastic box, into a strange building. It smelt of cleaning things and... and... catty scents.

I heard meows. Other cats? In my territory? Was I still in my territory?

I heard my human talking to a female human. She smelt nice.

They lifted up the plastic box and opened it... into a strange, small, brick house, with a window. It had a wee tray in it, and my little catty bed.

I had a sniff and a look.

My human was wittering away, making human sounds, saying something about 'missing my Clive', and stroking my head.

That was nice, but I spotted a large hole in this small house. I could jump through it, so I did. There was big ledge with a window to look out of. I saw a sparrow.


When I came back from the ledge, my human was gone, but my little home was warm, so I didn't care. I had a nap.

I stayed in this mini-home for what felt like catty-months. I got lots of affection from female humans, and, when I meowed my head off, they fed me. I was enjoying it.

... then my human turned up again, and said: 'Cliiiiiive!'

I blinked.

The nice-smelling lady put me back in the weird plastic box and gave me back to my human. I was confused again.

My human put me back in the vroom and I meowed, and meowed, and meowed.

He stopped the vroom... and suddenly I was back in my home again.
I wasn't happy with my human, so I turned my back on him and showed him my bum hole.

But... I had to rule my territory again, so I rubbed myself against every door frame, chair, and table.

I then meowed at the walls, did a big poo in my tray, and shredded a newspaper.

What a strange holiday.

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