Waking up happy

Sometimes I just wake up in the middle of the night and I'm happy.
This means I want attention, chin tickles, and head pats.

I curled up next to my human's head last night. I made sure I was within stroking and patting range.

I woke up after a bit and was really happy. I was purring and doing a little happy catty dance. I wanted attention.

I thought my human should know about my happiness.

I walked over to him and nose-nudged him in the face, then went round and nose-nudged the other side of his face.

He said 'eh', reached out, and patted my head.

This made me even happier.

I walked onto his back and padded my paws up and down, then headbutted his head.

I walked to his face and nose-nudged him again... and again... and again.

He stroked my ear and face.

I liked this.

I rolled onto my side, to show my belly, and made a 'brrr' noise.

My human rubbed my belly.

I fell asleep.

Thoughts

I wonder what my nose smells like?
I wonder what my cheeks smell like?

I know what they taste like: I can lick them both.
I just can’t sniff them.

This bothers me.

I may have to eat tuna and think about this.

Not enough

I came in to see my human last night.

I needed food.

I jumped onto his bed, walked up him, and put my nose in his ear.
He said 'eugh, Clive', and rolled over.

I sat by his head and purred until he said 'okay, okay', then he got up and walked to my food bowl.

He put some tuna in jelly in my bowl.

I ate it and purred, then realised I was still hungry.

My human had laid down again, so I jumped onto the bed, walked over him, and sat on his head.
He said 'Clive, get off', and pushed me.

I went to where his face was and gave him some light catty headbutts.

He made a huffing noise, got up again, and put some more food in my bowl.

I ate the food and purred.
I was still hungry.

I went back to my human. I pawed at his face, then found some paper to claw and shred.

He said 'for fuck's sake', then got up and put some more food in my bowl.

I ate the food and purred.
I was now full.

I jumped onto my human's bed and slept on his feet.

Chair?

I have seven chairs I usually sit on.
I went into the room near the outside door today, and the chair in there was gone.

Where had it gone?
There was a space where it usually was.

I went over to the space.
I sniffed around it.
I got dust up my nose and did a catty-choo.

I was confused.

I crouched down in the space for a bit.
I meowed at the wall.

I went to where one of my other chairs should be.
It was there.
I had a nap.

Bouncy thing

I was in the garden.
It's warm.

I was sitting in the middle of the grass, watching over my territory, when a little thing with legs bounced past me.

My eyes were fixed on it. Must pounce.


I was just doing a pre-pounce wiggle, when the little thing bounced again and went over my head.
This confused me.

I spotted it, wiggled, pounced... and it bounced from between my paws.

I spotted it again, ran over to it, pounced, and got it.
I lifted up my paw... and it bounced away from me.

I chased it and it bounced, bounced, bounced, and went into a bush.

My ears went forward. I didn't understand the bouncy thing.

I stared at the bush for ages, but the bouncy thing didn't bounce again, so I had a nap.

Sitting

I came in to see my human last night.

I think it was late.

It was dark.

My human was sleeping and making a weird snorting noise from his mouth.

I wanted attention.

I jumped on the bed.

I walked up to his head.

I walked onto his head.

I sat on his head.

I purred.

He didn't wake up.

I kept purring.

I kept purring.

I kept purring.

He woke up and stroked my head. About time.

I sat on his head until he got up and fed me.

Shredding

I like paper things.
I like shredding them with my claws.
This is lucky as my human has lots of paper things.

This morning I found something that said 'HM Revenue & Customs' on it.
I pawed it, then shredded it with my claws.
My human shouted: 'Clive! Stop it!'

I looked at him and carried on shredding it. I was having fun.

He came over to me and took the paper from between my paws.
I had a sad.

I licked my paw for a bit... then I spotted something else made of paper. It said 'NatWest' on it.
I grabbed it, bit it, then shredded it. Such fun.

My human put his hand to his face and shook his head.

I wasn't sure what this meant, so I carried on shredding the paper.