I has a catty poem to share with you. I hope you enjoy it.
Meow, Meow,
Meow, Meow,
Meowwww,
Meowwww.
Meowwww, Meowwww,
Meeeeooowww,
Meow Meow
Meoooowwwww.
Meowww,
Meow, Meow, Meow,
Meoww, Meowww,
Meeeeeeeeeow.
Meow, Meowwww,
Meow, Meow,
Meeoowww, Meeeeowwww,
Meow, Meowww.
I hope it means as much to you as it does to me.
I sometimes think of it before I go hunting.
After rattling the door handle a few times, and singing the song of my people, I managed to get my human out of bed.
He opened the door from the room where he has sleeps, and I ran past him to the back door.
I pawed and pawed at this door, as I needed a wee.
My human let me out.
After I had a wee, I decided it was a bit damp outside, so I came back to the back door and meowed and pawed at it until my human let me back in.
I lay on the floor for a bit, but the air didn't quite feel right, so I went to the back door and pawed and meowed until my human let me back out.
I couldn't see any birds or meeces about, and let out a big catty yawn. I felt tired. I came back to the back door and pawed and meowed until my human let me in.
I wandered round for a bit, sniffing corners, but some dust got up my catty nose and I then needed to go outside to clear it, with fresh air. I pawed and meowed at the back door until my human arrived and let me out.
I decided that I missed my human, so I came back to the back door and pawed and meowed until he let me back in.
He did say 'for fuck's sake, Clive!', but I'm not sure what this means.
I went for a nap.
It's my catty birthday! It's my catty birthday! It's my catty birthday!
Happy catty birthday to me!
I woke up my human by repeatedly sniffing his ear. I was too excited to stay asleep.
He patted me on the head so I bit him.
After that, he got up, gave me a cuddle, and put some biscuits out for me, then he wandered off... and came back with chicken - proper, fresh chicken.
Sometimes I quite like my human.
After my chicken, I had a nap - then I cleaned all of my fur so that it smelt of chicken.
I went to lick my catty balls, as a special treat, then realised that I don't have any.
I chased some shadows and dust for a bit, then my human got ready to go out.
I am now going on a birthday hunt. I will let you know how this goes.
I was asleep on a chair, a little earlier, but I heard the sound of a plastic lid being removed from a tub full of chicken.
This put my catty senses on high alert; my ears stood up, my nose twitched, my eyes opened ... then I had a stretch and wandered over to my human.First I just stared at him and wiggled my nose, trying to look cute.I jumped onto a chair next to my human, and continued to stare at him, occasionally blinking.I tried to jump up onto the table, where the chicken was, but my human said 'no, Clive' and pushed me back down. I meowed in protest.
I got down from the chair and sat on the floor immediately next to my human.
I opened my eyes wide and stared at him, pleading for chicken. I added a few 'I'm sad' meows.
I tried rubbing against his legs for a bit, then I placed both front paws on one of his legs. I forgot to pull my claws in, so my human said 'Ow! Shit!'
I went back to just staring at my human and meowing. In the end it worked and he gave me a big piece of chicken.
I was happy and I purred.
Catty persistence always pays off.
I like chicken
I was bored and was wandering round the room where my human has his human toilet.
I sniffed all corners of the room and rubbed myself against the walls.
I jumped up onto the human toilet and found some bottles and tubs balanced above it. I decided to paw them.
A fairly small container fell to the floor. I decided to bat it about for a bit.
I kept batting it about, then realised that there was white dust everywhere, and a cloud of white dust in the air ... and my fur was now grey.
I also started to catty-choo, as the dust got right up my little catty nose.
I don't know what this stuff was. The container said 'Talcum Powder' on it. It wasn't food.
I decided to go somewhere else and clean myself - my human will get rid of the strange dust.
My human is stupid.
It's very cold at the moment. When I go out, my little catty nose is freezing and I sometimes get frost on my whiskers.
When I want to come back indoors, I want to be let in quickly.
Yesterday, I came home and meowed at the front door to be let in. I meowed, and meowed, and meowed, but my human didn't seem to hear me.
My bum was getting cold, so I ran to the side door, down an alley, and meowed outside that. I did my best, helpless, 'let me in' meow. Still no sign of my human.
My bum was getting cold again, so I ran to the back door and meowed there. I started to truly sing the song of my people and combine this with lots of pawing at the door.
Finally, my human approached the door and opened it. I sniffed the door frame, to check it was okay, then trotted into the house, giving my best 'I'm annoyed' meow before leading my human to my food bowl.
Stupid human.
Last night, I happily fell asleep on my human.
He was lying on the bed, and I curled up on his lap.
It was nice and warm, and I was purring. I fell into a deep catty sleep.
... then he moved. Selfish human. He squirmed a bit and started to turn over.
I had to open my eyes, sit up, yawn, then fully stand up and stretch... before walking in a circle, three times, and curling up next to him.
He fell asleep on his front, so I moved over and got comfy on his lower legs.
I'd not long closed my eyes, when he started wriggling again.
He was getting on my nerves.
I got up, stretched, and moved nearer his head. I curled up on his upper back and wrapped my tail round my nose.
I was in a deep sleep when he started wriggling again. I meowed, in protest, then got up and wandered down to his lower back.
I was super comfy on my human's lower back. I closed my eyes, set my ears to 'alert', and drifted off....
.... but my human woke me, yet again, by wriggling.
I was so annoyed, that I bit his bum.
He said 'ow!' and woke up, looking round at me.
I blinked my displeasure at him.
He moaned and went back to sleep.
I'd had enough of his selfishness, so I wandered over to the pillow next to him and slept there instead.
