I think my human thinks I'm stupid.
Sometimes, when I'm hungry, I'll meow by my bowl and there's some old, dry food in there - with no jelly left on the chunks.
I don't like these bits - they smell funny.
My human will lift the bowl up, to put new food in, and I get excited.
He sometimes looks in the bowl and says 'what a waste', but I don't know what this means.
He then puts fresh food in the bowl, with lots of jelly on it, and puts it down for me.
I run over to the bowl and eat, but sometimes... sometimes... I can smell the old, dry food underneath.
I sniff and sniff the bowl, then back away from it and look up at my human. He's left the old food underneath the new food. He thinks I won't notice.
I stare at my human until he does the right thing and removes the old food - keeping the fresh food in there, with some catty biscuits on top. Then I eat.
Idiot human.
The sun has gone in.
I has a sad.
I don't mind being outside in the rain, as long as I have a table or something that I can sit under.
But there is one type of rain I don't like.
Light rain is okay, even though it makes my fur go all fuzzy.
Rain that comes straight from above is okay, even if it does plink on the top of my head.
But I really don't like rain that comes from the side, blown by the wind.
Side rain blows into my ears - doesn't matter which way I face. It makes the inside of my ears cold and wet, and it makes me do catty head-shakes.
There is side rain today, so I've come inside to sit by a window and watch it.
I want to bite the raindrops.
I'll probably have a nap.
I like flapping paper with my paw.
I like flapping books, loose bits of paper, letters, bills - anything my human leaves lying around.
Sometimes I do this so that my human hurries up and pays me attention.
Sometimes I do it just because it's fun to flap at things.
I found a new thing to flap. It's made of lots of little, yellow bits of paper.
I really liked flapping it.
I kept doing it and my human shouted 'Clive! Stop it!'
I liked this attention.
I kept flapping the yellow bits of paper, then one came off ... and it stuck to my paw.
I didn't like this.
I flapped my paw about, to get the yellow paper off, but it was still stuck to it.
I kept flapping my paw, but the yellow paper stayed stuck.
I panicked and ran off, flapping my paw.
The yellow paper was going to be stuck to me forever.
I meowed and ran around, flapping my paw.
I ran into the big comfy chair, and the yellow bit of paper fell off my paw.
I sniffed it. It wasn't alive.
I had a nap.
I was outside last night, in the dark, when a light suddenly went on.
It was only shining on one spot.
I sat underneath it and all of these flies, moths, and other funny things appeared.
I was surrounded by little snacks. I had a feast.
I bited all the little things in the air.
The light went off, but I moved a bit and it came back on again.
I ated more flying things.
I like this light.
My human went to reach for my catty biscuits and picked up something new - something in a yellow packet.
He pulled out a long, red and brown stick, then put it in front of my nose, for sniffs.
It smelt really good.
He dropped the stick on the floor and I bit it. It tasted of meat. It was yummy. I ated it very quickly... then looked up at my human for another one.
I like these new meaty sticks.
I has a happy.
I has had a lazy day.
I didn't want to chase or bite anything, so I just watched lots of flying things.
I watched a fly go over my head.
I watched a flap-flap flutter in front of me.
I watched a bee go backwards and forwards.
I watched a beetle land near my bum.
I stared at a tree.
I had a nap.
My human has changed something.
He has put some new pots in my territory.
He didn't warn me he was going to do this.
I had a confused.
This meant there were now new things in my territory that didn't smell of me.
I had to walk past all of the pots and rub against them, so that they had my scent.
I had to do this lots of times.
There are seven new pots, so it took a while.
This was valuable napping time.
I wish my human would warn me before he puts new things in my territory.
